prettyashley.com

seriously, now that i don’t have health insurance or vision or dental or anything, i’ve become extremely paranoid about everything.

1. driving fast
2. driving without a seatbelt
3. knives
4. ice picks
5. chainsaws
6. random sharp objects
7. axes
8. boomsticks
9. high heels (could break an ankle!)
10. apples (could break a tooth)
11. caramels (pulling out fillings!)
12. any sort of sticky or hard food
13. and sugar-laden foods like cotton candy (which is basically just sugar ALL OVER YOUR MOUTH, which lead to cavities, which will then lead to fillings, which will then be pulled out by candy apples)
14. carnival food in general
15. deep fried cheese hot dogs wrapped in bacon
16. pregnancy
17. jumping off things like porches or my front stairs
18. the sun (sunburn! skin cancer! wrinkles!)
19. turning my ipod to maximum volume (hello hearing loss)
20. bears
21. sharks
22. things that can eat me
23. sitting on my knitting needles
24. airplanes
25. frying things
26. eating things that should be refrigerated but not
27. red meat
28. shaving (what if i nick my skin and it keeps bleeding because i developed that non-clotting disease? huh? huh?)
29. hair dye (what if i get it in my eye?)
30. the grand canyon skywalk

sort of. not really. i am a lot more careful about knives, though. and driving.